


Time Will Wait For No One

by sentencefragments



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: F/M, Misunderstandings, Unplanned Pregnancy, pre-island olicity
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-01
Updated: 2017-01-26
Packaged: 2018-04-29 06:31:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 18,867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5118659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sentencefragments/pseuds/sentencefragments
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Oliver and Felicity are blissfully happy together until a cruel twist of fate sinks the Queen’s Gambit while Oliver and his father are on their way to China for business. Oliver miraculously survives, fighting every day to make his way back to her. He learns about some things that have happened in his absence and decides to stay away. Until he doesn’t have a choice.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

  * For [missdarcys](https://archiveofourown.org/users/missdarcys/gifts), [everythingilove](https://archiveofourown.org/users/everythingilove/gifts).



_Move forward_  
_Don't look back_  
_Cause this is all we've got and time..._  
_Won't wait for no one_

* * *

 

_**October 7th, 2015** _

The ceiling fan turned slowly over his head, sending lazy wafts of air into his face. He'd turned it on out of habit from his time in Hong Kong, not because it was that hot inside the dingy motel room. Despite the illusion of silence, Oliver heard everything. The sound of late-night traffic three stories below mixed with the pounding rockabilly music from a nearby dive-bar. He heard the couple in the room next door arguing over the blaring TV. And if he really focused, he heard the motor of the ceiling fan buzzing with exertion from overuse and old age. It was the sound of his own breathing and the blood rushing through his ears that was deafening.

Oliver focused on slowing down his heartrate and closed his eyes for a moment. He was pretty sure one of Amanda's agents had fractured his arm when he'd fought his way out of the bar she'd taken him to. That should have been a red flag in the first place. Amanda Waller didn't do downtime and chitchat. Something in his gut had twisted the moment they'd stepped into the place, but he'd been too exhausted to care. He could only imagine what would've happened if he'd taken a sip of the drink she'd handed him. Nothing good, of that he was pretty damn sure.

He'd broken off one of the spokes of an old and forgotten chair in his motel room and had used it as a splint for his arm, tied with strips of fabric from the dirty sheets. He knew he needed a plan, he couldn't stay in Coast City until Amanda would find him again. With his arm rendered useless, he was even less mobile so he doubted he could fight off her agents again. She'd been right that he wasn't ready to go back to his family, but there really was no other way of escaping her.

Going home meant being in the public eye again. He wasn't particularly looking forward to that but it also meant Amanda couldn't just take him by his collar and send him on some twisted mission for ARGUS without raising questions. Questions she couldn't answer without revealing the existence of her secret organization. There were some lengths Amanda wasn't willing to go to, not even for Oliver Queen. He still wondered what her strange obsession with him was about. She always said that he had a particular skillset she needed, but he had always just done whatever he could to survive.

Oliver rolled onto his side, staring out the dirty window into the night. He thought about his family. Would they have changed much? He knew they had to. He'd been gone for a year and a half, that was one of the first things he figured out when he arrived in Coast City. Eighteen months of nothing but pain and suffering. What would it have been like for them? His mother losing her husband and son, Thea her father and brother, Tommy his best friend, Felicity…

With a sigh, he walked into the small bathroom, flicking on the fluorescent light and looked at himself in the mirror. His face was dirty. Roughened and unshaven. Nothing a few splashes of lukewarm water could clean. There were lines carved in his forehead and next to his eyes that weren't there before he left on the Queen's Gambit. His eyes were the same. The youthful spark had dissipated but the blue was the same. They reminded him of a different but familiar set of blue.

Calling himself her boyfriend, even only in his head, seemed inadequate. They'd been more than just boyfriend and girlfriend, but they hadn't been engaged either. Not yet, at least. They'd been partners in every sense of the word. They worked together on projects at Queen Consolidated by day and by night he spent his time making sure she knew exactly how loved she was. Oliver had known that she would always be 'it' for him, almost from the moment he met her. After months of wearing her down, promising her that any rules against 'inter-office relationships' would not be a problem. He even dared to quit his job as vice president if that was the only thing holding her back. When they finally got together, Oliver was sure he would one day marry her and start a family. They almost did. For once, he didn't dread it. With her, he didn't fear commitment. Oliver smiled as he remembered her sunny blonde hair and her pink lipstick and made up his mind.

So, with his arm in makeshift sling made from the remainders of the bedsheet, Oliver packed his bag, stuffing the few belongings he owned inside. His father's notebook and watch, Shado's hood, the knife Slade had given him, a sweatshirt he'd stolen in Hong Kong, the hozen with the coordinates of the Mirakuru, his worn out wallet with the picture of Felicity inside, a crumpled origami swan Akio had made one day and a bottle of water.

He wrapped his bow and quiver in the piece of leather Yao Fei had used to conceal it, back in the cave he'd taken Oliver to. He attached it to his backpack as securely as he could. Taking his hoodie, zipping it up over his defective arm and slinging his backpack over his good shoulder, Oliver made his way out of the motel room and into the brisk Coast City night.

He was going home.


	2. Lost & Found

_**April 10th, 2014** _

"I'm gonna miss you." She whispered, her lips pressed to his ear as he held her against him. The morning air was cold against their cheeks, but in each other's arms they didn't even notice. The salty smell of the ocean infiltrated their noses but all they were aware of was each other. Moira was saying goodbye to her husband not twenty feet away.

"It's only three weeks." Oliver whispered, leaning his head against hers. Her hair smelled like vanilla. Taking a deep breath, he tried to memorize it, the sweet mixture of her shampoo and her perfume and that waft that was just her. Just Felicity.

"I know, but I'm still going to miss you. My bed is going to be so cold and lonely."

"I'll be back before you know it to keep you warm." He teased, kissing her temple.

"Promise me?" She asked, hand trailing down his jaw, hopeful eyes staring up at him.

Oliver smiled softly and leaned down to kiss her. Felicity's arms wrapped around his neck tightly, like she never, ever wanted to let go. And to be honest, she didn't. She knew it was important for the company he take this trip and she knew how much the father-son bonding time was necessary to fix the nearly broken relationship but she couldn't help but have a bad feeling in the pit of her stomach.

"I promise." He whispered when they parted, bumping her nose against hers, making her smile.

"I love you." Felicity said.

He smiled and kissed her again. "I love you too."

"Now go, your father is calling for you." Felicity said, gesturing to where Robert was standing expectantly.

With one last swift peck on the lips, Oliver pulled his arms from around her waist, slowly stepping backwards. Away from her, her hand slipping out of his grasp. Oliver kissed his mother on the cheek as he passed her by, sending a wink in Felicity's direction. She smiled at him encouragingly, waving goodbye as he climbed aboard the Gambit. With Moira by her side, they watched the yacht push off the dock, the engine roaring up once the ties were loose.

They'd been together for about a year at that point, falling for each other hard and fast after Oliver got promoted to Vice President and they'd started working together closely. It had taken Oliver some time to convince her to go against the company rules of no inter-office relationships.

Felicity had become instant friends with Thea, and even Moira had grown to like her, which was a very rare occurrence. She always seemed to find something about Oliver's girlfriends that she didn't like, and if he was quite honest, now that he was with Felicity, he wondered what he ever saw in his past romantic partners. None of them just quite lived up to her and Oliver knew pretty early on that she was going to be the woman he wanted to spend his life with. Felicity was genuine, fought hard for what she wanted in life and embraced all her quirks, even if they did leave her flustered from time to time. Oliver thought her babbling in particular was endearing and he never wanted her to stop.

Robert, on the other hand, had actually been quite mad at his son for defying his rules but once he got to know Felicity and experienced firsthand how taken Oliver was with her over dinner at the Queen family home, he'd eased off of him. He realized that however many mistakes his son had made in his life, dating Felicity wasn't one of them. The business trip extended into a recreational yachting trip they were taking now was a way for them to mend their fences, the ocean and the salty air a reminder of the past.

Father and son stood on the deck, waving until the women they loved were too small to make out in the distance.

* * *

 

**_November 1st, 2015_ **

Jumping over the fence surrounding the Queen estate had been easy enough, even with his broken arm. So was avoiding the security camera's. He would really have to look into that, maybe hire a new head of security. One that would keep his family safe from unexpected guests. Like him. Oliver swallowed as it dawned on him that in this scenario, he was the intruder.

It had taken him three weeks to get to Starling City. A trip that would normally take a day by car, or a couple of hours by plane. Sure, he'd hitchhiked when he'd been too tired, his feet swollen and covered in blisters from his cheap shoes, but he'd done most of the path on foot. Trekking through deserted patches of land, alongside a single lonely road and through small, almost abandoned towns gave him some time to consider his options, make a game plan.

The fact that he had time to think about it, didn't mean he actually managed to make a plan. His thoughts drifted off whenever he tried to think strategies. They always ended up at the same place too, with the same person. Her. Felicity. His thoughts gravitated towards her like a baby duck to its mother.

So now, here he was, making a snap decision to sneak in, instead of using the front door like a civilized person.

He made it to the house without triggering any alarms or being spotted by any guards but when he got to the door, he hesitated before pushing it open. His childhood home lay before his feet and all he had to do was turn the knob.

For three years he'd thought about this moment, had dreamed about it, wondered what it would be like, but now that it was actually happening, Oliver didn't know exactly what to do. Just like with jumping over the fence, he made a snap decision and did the only thing he could do, really: he stepped inside.

Unlike in his dreams, the house was quiet. Not bustling with life. No little sister running around. No mother expertly arranging bouquets into vases. No Felicity running up to him to welcome him back. It was just him in the foyer, his dirty shoes probably staining the expensive Persian carpet.

"Hello?" He called out curiously. No answer.

Closing the door behind him, he walked further inside, to the center table filled with picture frames. He picked on up, a black and white picture of him and his father when he was just a boy. He remembered that day well. His dad had taken him to the office for the first time. His mother had dressed him up in a tiny suit with a tie and he'd waltzed into Queen Consolidated like he owned the place, which he practically did, but that's not the point. His father's assistant had given him soda and it had been the best day of his life.

He'd been so entranced by the memory and the grief over his father that he hadn't heard the heels clicking down the hallway.

He did, however, hear the sharp crash of the vase shattering on the ground when it slipped from his mother's fingers. Oliver dropped the picture frame and automatically jumped into defense mode. His mother stood there, shocked, frozen, eyes wide like a deer in the headlights. Her feet were wet from the water from the vase. She would be complaining about the water stain in the hardwood floor later.

Her hands twitched as the initial shock wore off. "Oliver." She breathed, taking a careful step closer, the broken glass crunching under her heels.

Smiling softly, Oliver walked around the center table and smiled at her. "Mom. I'm home."

Her bottom lip trembled as she stepped even closer, almost tripping over the shards of glass. She reached for him, hands shaking, tears already staining her cheeks.

"Oh, my beautiful boy. You're alive!" She cried, wrapping her arms around him tightly. The stench that he knew came off of him didn't seem to bother her, and neither did the dirt on his clothes.

"Ow! Mom, careful, I broke my arm." He winced as her hold got just a little bit too tight, trapping his injured arm between them.

"Oh!" She yelped, quickly letting go of him, putting her hands on his cheeks, swatting his hair out of his face. "Oh, sweetheart I am so sorry. We should get you to a hospital!"

"No, mom, it's fine. We can do that later." He insisted, placing his hand on top of hers, smiling softly.

"I could really use a shower first."

Her bottom lip trembled again. "I can't believe you're here." She whispered, wiping away tears.

Pulling her back into his arms, he hugged her close, wrapping his good arm around her shoulders as she cried into his chest. Oliver sighed. He couldn't really believe it either and he feared it would only be a matter of time before everything came crashing down around him.


	3. Reunions & Revelations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> with no beta, so all mistakes and weirdness are mine!

_**November 5th, 2015** _

Felicity was pissed. Not a text or a call or even a goddamn e-mail, nothing! She had to hear from the nice news anchor from Channel 52 that the love of her life was alive after almost two years of thinking he'd drowned in the North China Sea. Oliver had been spotted exiting the hospital with his arm in a sling and his mother by his side. The press went crazy. Turned out the family had resurrected him, legally speaking, in secret a couple days before that, asking for privacy in these difficult times.

Lying to keep out the press was one thing, lying to her was another story.

In nervous anger, she threw the door of her car shut and stomped over to the front door of the Queen family home, gravel crunching under her shoes. She knocked on the door incessantly, biting her bottom lip so hard she was sure she was gonna taste blood soon.

Moira opened the door for her.

"Felici-"she started, holding up a hand to stop her.

"Why didn't you call me? I had a right to know." She confronted her almost mother-in-law.

Moira averted her eyes and sighed. "Listen, darling… He's not the same. He asked me to give him some time."

Felicity's face fell, and she took a step back, suddenly feeling a lot less angry and even more confused. She pressed a hand to her forehead, taking a shaky breath.

"He didn't want to see me?" She stammered in a soft voice, hand clamping over her mouth as her own words registered in her brain. Oliver had asked his mother to keep everyone away. To keep her away. Didn't he love her? Had something happened that had made him not love her anymore? Deep down she knew she was being unreasonable. Oliver had been through hell and back. He'd survived the shipwreck and here she was being more worried about their relationship status than the fact that he was alive. A tear trickled down her cheek. She would give him time if that was what he needed. His health had priority. The rest could wait, even though she was anxious to tell him now that he was here.

"I'm sorry I exploded at you. I'll just… I'll go." Felicity whispered, shaking her head and turning on her heel.

That's when she heard him.

"Felicity? Is that you?"

She stopped in her tracks, gravel skidding under her feet. Her breath hitched before she turned around again. Moira moved out of her way, stepping out of the doorway. Pressing her lips into a firm line, holding her breath, she stepped over the threshold.

He stood maybe five foot away from her, in grey sweatpants, a white t-shirt and the same blue sling she'd seen on tv. Maybe it was because she was euphoric to see him again but he'd never looked more handsome. His skin was tan, his hair cropped short and his biceps almost twice the size as she remembered. Felicity swallowed hard, taking him in slowly before meeting his eyes.

Even though everything about him seemed different, the blue was still the same. Piercing and bright. He was watching her, she knew that. Normally, it would make her feel uncomfortable, but not with him. Never with him. Swallowing hard, she bit her lip and took a step closer, smiling shyly.

"Felicity." He gasped under his breath, a soft smile tugging at his lips.

Her breath was unsteady as tears wet her cheeks. The distance between them was gone the next moment with her face pressed against his hard chest and his good arm wrapped around her shoulders. He was warm, just like she remembered, encompassing her so that she would never be cold.

"I missed you so much." She whispered against his chest, tears leaving mascara stains on his clean white shirt. Neither of them cared.

Oliver kissed the top of her head before pressing his cheek against the soft blonde hair.

"I'm here. I'm okay."

Clenching her hands in his t-shirt, Felicity relaxed against him, softly sniffling. She was so happy and relieved to have him in her arms again that all her worries seemed to slip off of her shoulders. Some of the worries had bubbled up the moment she hear the news of his return but all of that seemed not to matter now. She was here. He was here. They were together again. She knew it would take time for them to get back to normal, especially considering how much both of them had gone through over the past two years. She wasn't even sure he wanted to go back to how they were before the Gambit sank.

It didn't matter now. All that mattered were the two of them, in that moment.

* * *

**_May 15th, 2014_ **

It was about two weeks after his funeral, on what was supposed to be Oliver's twenty-ninth birthday. Felicity sat in her apartment, alone and in the dark, her Livingroom basking in the soft light the single candle in the cupcake on her coffee-table was giving off. The warm glow the only light in the entire apartment. Felicity sniffled, wiping the back of her hand across her tearstained cheeks as she mourned the love of her life. She missed him so. The thought of him never coming back to her seemed unreal. Like something on a TV-show. These things didn't happen in real life. At least not to her.

She'd just finished the tissue box when she felt it. The churning of her stomach. Nausea. Taking a deep breath and closing her eyes, she waited for it to pass. It didn't. She figured it was stress or the overload of emotions her body had endured over the past few weeks, but where calming herself usually worked, it didn't this time. She almost tripped over a side-table as she sprinted towards the bathroom, barely managing to reach the toilet. Tears stung her eyes as the acid taste burned her throat. She pulled her hair out of her face, taking deep breaths to slow her racing heart before she lunged for the toilet again.

For a long while, she sat on the bathroom floor with her head between her knees, the tile feeling cold through her flimsy pajama shorts. She'd managed to pull her hair up in a messy bun, keeping it out of her face while she got sick.

After a while, she felt like she could stand again, even if her knees were a bit wobbly. She leaned against her sink, rummaging through her medicine cabinet, trying to find some Pepto Bismal or Zofran to sooth her stomach. She didn't find it but she was sure she had it somewhere. Maybe she had just misplaced it.

Biting the inside of her cheek, Felicity searched for the meds until she ended up with the little basket where she kept the stuff for her cycle in her hands. The grass green thing was filled to the brim with pads, tampons, birth control pills, some condoms and ibuprofen. No Zofran nor Pepto Bismal, but she wasn't sure she even needed those anymore.

Her legs gave out from underneath her. She plopped down on the bathroom floor, basket still clutched firmly in her hands while she attempted to do the math. She hadn't realized it had been so long. Between all the craziness at work and then the grief of losing the man she loved she hadn't even noticed. Her heartrate picked up, thundering in her chest as she dug through the basket to find the box of birth control pills with the most recent date on it. The sticker said the prescription had been ready back in January. She had to take a long, deep breath to steady herself when she realized that after those pills had run out, she still had been having sex with Oliver for six more weeks. Unprotected sex.

The tears spilled over her cheeks as she tried to remember when she'd had her last period. She couldn't. A hand clamped over her mouth to keep her from screaming her lungs out. She dropped everything she was holding, the basket flipping over, spilling its contents all over the bathroom floor as she scrambled to her feet.

The living room was completely dark, the candle in the cupcake burned out. She stumbled to her bedroom, flicking on the light. Instinctively, a trembling hand moved to her stomach, pressing down carefully. Her breath hitched as she leaned against the door. She closed her eyes, silent tears dripping down her cheeks. Her usually soft and squishy stomach had an unfamiliar hardness to it that she hadn't noticed before. Her skin was pulled taut over the tiniest of bumps. In that moment, she knew it was true. She was pregnant.

She slid down to the floor, clutching the fabric covering her stomach. The tears flowed freely. She was kind of surprised she had any left. She thought about Oliver, how excited he would have been even if they hadn't been planning to have kids anytime soon. Hell, they hadn't been married or engaged. They'd been together for little over a year, it would have been way too soon. She could already imagine the gossip going around the office. That she had deliberately gotten knocked up to lock him down. To insure herself a life of wealth. It was probably going to be even worse now that he was gone. The tabloids would discuss how the baby probably wasn't his. That she'd gotten herself inseminated or had slept with some random dude and tell everybody it was Oliver's baby. Felicity pulled her knees up, wrapping her arms around her legs, curling up in a ball, be as small as she possibly could.

No matter the gossip, or the doubts, Oliver would have loved this baby with everything that he had. She was sure of it. That only made it worse that he wasn't there. She was carrying his child, a part of him and the little boy or girl would never get to meet their dad. The wonderful man that had wooed her, changed her life, helped her with her abandonment issues. The man she loved with all her heart. The man that she had intended to marry one day. The love of her life and now the father of her child.

Felicity cried herself to sleep that night and the following morning, her OB confirmed her suspicions. She was pregnant and had been so for a while now. With teary eyes, Felicity learned that she was eleven weeks along.


	4. Encounters & Espionage

_**November 7th, 2015** _

They had agreed to meet at the park Oliver used to go to when he was a kid. Felicity knew he loved it there and probably figured that it would be easier to tell him in a space where he felt safe. It was a nice day for early November in Starling City, the sun was shining, a light breeze coming in from the ocean, slowly loosening more and more leaves from their trees letting them flutter to the ground. The squeals and laughter from a nearby playground drifted over with the wind. He leaned forward on the wooden bench. It creaked as he shifted his weight. Leaning his elbows on his knees he rubbed his hands together waiting for her to appear.

He knew exactly what she was going to confess to him and a part of him was glad that she wouldn't try to hide it him in attempt of looking out for his wellbeing. Keeping secrets never worked out for anyone's sanity.

So, it didn't surprise him when he saw the girl with the blonde hair, the girl he loved, appear, pushing a stroller out in front of her. Felicity gave him a soft smile when she saw him before tucking her bottom lip between her teeth nervously. A million different things went through his mind in that moment but the thought of how well she looked pushing that stroller was the one that stuck. Motherhood suited her like he had always known it would. After all, before the Gambit went down, he'd given it a lot of thought, always intending to marry her one day and start a family. He watched her walk over to the old green bench with the cracked paint he was sitting on.

"Hi." He said, standing up to greet her with a hug.

"Hi." She whispered back, wrapping her arms around him, hands softly moving up and down. The stroller forgotten for just a moment. Until it made a high-pitched whining noise.

Felicity pulled away quickly, hovering over the stroller, hands disappearing as she soothed the screaming child. Oliver watched in amazement as the baby stopped crying as soon as Felicity gave him or her attention.

"I guess you figured out what I wanted to tell you, already." Felicity said with a breathy laugh.

Oliver nodded. "Yeah."

Felicity smiled again and sat down next to him on the bench, rocking the stroller with one hand.

"When.. How old.." Oliver started, unsure of what to ask first.

"She's turning one in about two weeks." Felicity said with a soft but proud smile.

"She?" He asked, his eyebrows flying up into his hairline.

Felicity nodded. "Would you want to meet her?"

Oliver smiled. "Yeah. I'd like that."

With a smile, Felicity stood up again, reaching into the stroller pulling out a kicking and squirming little girl huddled in a soft green blanket.

"Oliver, meet Meghan." Felicity said softly as she settled the little girl on her hip, gently bouncing her up and down a little to keep her entertained.

His eyes went a little wider. "Meghan? As in your grandmother?"

Felicity nodded. "She died a few months after you disappeared. She never got to meet this little one." Felicity said stroking Meghan's cheek. The little girl reached for her mother's hand, putting a finger in her mouth and gnawing on it a little with the teeth that were coming through.

"I'm sorry to hear that." Oliver muttered, putting a hand on Felicity's shoulder.

"Thank you." She whispered back at him, smiling gently before looking back down at her daughter. Oliver followed her gaze, for the first time really looking at the girl. Meghan had beautiful blue eyes, eyes that looked very familiar. He'd done the math, there was a possibility that she was his child. She certainly had his sister's eyes if she indeed was his daughter. If not, it must have been a crazy coincidence because the dark color of her soft downy hair certainly wasn't in his genepool. Or Felicity's. It was nearly black with a gentle curl at the ends.

She wasn't his, she couldn't be. And even if it was true, he could never be the father she deserved. He thought he'd been ready before the Gambit sank but after everything that happened to him, after everything he'd been through, he wasn't so sure anymore.

If Tommy was the father like he suspected, that was a whole other story that he didn't really feel like getting into right now. That would be boundary between them that he shouldn't have crossed. Yet.

Oliver smiled down at the little girl sitting contently in Felicity's lap, playing with her mother's watch. Felicity let a hand stroke over her dark hair, leaning down to press a kiss to the top of her head.

"She was born on November 22nd at three in the morning. She was about a week early, but as healthy as she could be." Felicity told him.

He had to tear his gaze off the mesmerizing little girl with the big blue eyes to look at his almost fiancée. He wasn't sure what they were anymore but friends. Neither of them had talked about a relationship and now that Felicity had a child to worry about, a child he already felt the strange need to protect as well, he wasn't sure how he fit into that life. He wanted it, but it was going to take a lot of effort and he didn't know if he was ready for that and if he could be the person they'd need him to be. His time away had changed him and only he knew how much.

"Da!" Meghan squealed, pulling him out of his thoughts, his head snapping back down to the baby girl. He was met with the same blue eyes that had already had him wrapped around her tiny little fingers and two cubby little hands reaching for him, making grabby hands in eagerness.

"She likes you." Felicity said. "Do you want to hold her?"

Oliver barely heard her, completely in trance by the way this little girl was so ecstatic to see him, to be near to him. It had his brain wandering into dangerous territory of hopes and dreams he shouldn't be thinking of. Not now, maybe not ever. Numbly, he nodded, reaching out his hands to take hold of the squirming little girl. She was giggling and squealing as he held her against his chest, her little feet stomping on his thigh like it was the most exciting thing in the world. Meghan put her little fist in her mouth, playfulness twinkling behind her eyes. Oliver smiled at her, the warm little body pressed against his giving him a sense of comfort he never knew he needed before. He was a goner, completely in love with the happy baby girl in his arms. It didn't matter if she wasn't his daughter. She was the daughter of the woman he loved, had and always would love. That love extended onto family members and so also onto little Meghan.

In that moment, he vowed to protect the little girl with his life. With everything he had. He had dreaded to meet her, and face Felicity for months, but all those worries and doubts melted away like snow before the sun.

* * *

 

_**May 6th, 2015** _

He barely had enough time to duck into the conference room before the sound of footsteps paused, replaced by the swish of the glass door before they continued. Holding his breath, hidden behind a pillar, he watched from the shadows as the woman he loved, the woman he hadn't seen in over a year, the woman who thought he was dead, walk into his father's old office.

Oliver watched as she walked around the heavy mahogany desk, dropping a file in the center with a sigh. She put her hands on the edge and leaned forward, taking a deep breath before standing back up and reached for a picture frame. He knew what photo she was looking at and he had to swallow back a lump in his throat.

"I miss you, Oliver. Every day." He heard her whisper, softly stroking the edges of the frame.

Oliver could see her blinking back tears as she looked up. "I wish you were here. I wish you never left. I need you. Please, if you can hear me right now, come back to me. You promised."

The last words she managed to croak out had his heart skipping a beat. He promised he'd come back. The only thing holding him back was the thought of Maseo's family and the people he put in danger as the man in question was yelling in his ear through his earpiece to get the hell out of there. Without a thought, he reached up to press the off-button, his head now filled with nothing but silence and the longing to be with the woman he loved. He almost stepped out to reveal his presence. Almost.

But, Felicity's phone rang, pulling him out of his numbness and back into stealth mode. She herself jumped back in surprise, completely caught off guard by the sudden loudness of the cheery ringtone. Oliver watched her wipe at her cheeks before pulling her phone out of her pocket. She took a deep breath before answering.

"Yes?" She said, listening for a long moment, nodding along to whatever the person on the other side was saying. Suddenly, her face contorted in a cringe as she hit herself across the forehead.

"Of course! I'm so sorry I forgot that was today. I'm on my way."

Felicity hung up, muttering to herself as she hurried out of the office. It was probably the stupidest idea he'd ever had, but Oliver decided to follow her.


	5. Lurking & Lunches

_**May 6th, 2015** _

He ended up 'loaning' someone's bike, driving behind Felicity's familiar red mini cooper as a safe distance so that she wouldn't spot him. He dumped the bike a few blocks away when he realized she was heading home, to her townhouse. A place he very well remembered and loved. A place he'd once thought of as home. He still kind of did because she was there. She was his home.

Oliver hid in the bushes in the small backyard, with a perfect view of the large window in the living room. The scene that played out in front of him wasn't anywhere near what he'd imagined he would find. Tommy was there. And not just lounging, because they'd been friends before the Gambit went down, that wasn't what surprised him. No, Tommy Merlyn, party boy extraordinaire, master of all things intoxicating and serial non-committer, was holding a baby, rocking the tiny thing as it cried his or her lungs out. He could hear the cries through the glass. The child's face was red with strain as Tommy tried to sooth them back to sleep, softly caressing their back and whispering in an attempt to calm them down. It didn't seem to be working.

Oliver saw Tommy's head snap up in the other direction. Felicity was home. She came into view quickly after that, her mouth and hands moving rapidly in what Oliver could only assume were a million apologies. She instantly reached for the small child in Tommy's arms, lifting it up and pulling the baby into her own embrace.

Swallowing hard, Oliver stared at the woman he loved, the woman he'd imagined himself starting a family with. He watched her have a family with a man that wasn't him. It felt like a stab through the heart. Tommy cracked a joke that left Felicity laughing, a hand stroking through the soft baby hair as she rocked the child from side to side. Tommy moved to gather his things, pressing a kiss to Felicity's cheek, lighting a fire deep inside Oliver. Jealousy mixed with anger and hurt welled up deep inside him. He didn't want to know about this but yet he couldn't look away.

On the other side of the house, he heard the roar of Tommy's engine as he started the car and pulled out the driveway. His hands twitched, inclined to follow his best friend and tell him exactly what he thought about this whole situation. That he was definitely not pleased that he'd been the one to impregnate the woman of his dreams. That was supposed to be his job.

But, as the sound of the sports car faded into the distance, Oliver couldn't help but stare at Felicity soothing the baby back to sleep while whispered soft words to the child. His heart warmed over as the first tears that he hadn't allowed himself to shed spilled over his cheeks. That was supposed to be his life, with her. She was living, moving on and making her own choices while he was being forced into doing things he never wanted, hurting people who didn't deserve it. It wasn't right.

Taking a deep breath, he vowed that he would find his way back to her, eventually, even if it meant watching her live her life with Tommy instead of with him. He couldn't blame her. He was supposed to be dead. All that mattered to him was that she was happy. Even if that meant a life without him.

* * *

 

_**November 15th, 2015** _

About a week after his first meeting with little Meghan, Oliver found himself wandering into QC. He'd talked to his mother about going back to his position as Vice President. She'd been adamant in informing him of the importance of his work at the company but he'd refused to go back. He wasn't ready for that kind of responsibility yet. He had to sort out his issues and quiet his demons first.

Without a thought, he took the elevator up to the executive offices, the familiar mechanical sounds soothing his nerves. Why he was nervous he wasn't sure. If he was honest to himself, he had been avoiding Felicity, and not even on purpose. He was glad she'd told him about her daughter, because keeping things like that a secret rarely worked out, he knew that. But, he hadn't been prepared for how much it still hurt to think about her living her life without him. His brain told him, repeatedly that it was unreasonable to expect from her to put her life on hold until he came back. Oliver was well aware of that fact. He wasn't even supposed to be back. But, his heart wouldn't shut up about how he still longed for her. She'd been his entire world before the gambit went down, and that hadn't changed. Only now the world had grown to include a little baby girl.

The ding of the elevator pulled Oliver out of his thoughts. He stepped into the light and spacious hallway, rounding the corner, peeking into the office where he spotted Felicity. A soft smile upturned his lips as he watched talk on the phone, spinning around in her chair. As she hung up, Oliver didn't waste a second, ignoring her assistants protests against him going in without an appointment. Felicity spotted him immediately, a mixture of shock and relief and happiness on her face.

"Oliver!" She said with a smile. "What a nice surprise."

She stood up from her chair to greet him with a hug, a hug that lasted too long and was too firm for people who agreed to 'build on their friendship'. They hadn't discussed the possibility of anything more than just friendship. And he knew he that was what he wanted. Oliver held her close as long as he could, reveling in the scent of her hair and the softness of her body pressed against his hard chest. When they parted, Felicity quickly dismissed her assistant, who was apologizing for letting him through.

"I was wondering when I'd see you again." Felicity said softly as they sat down in the sitting area of her office that consisted of two black leather chairs and a coffee table.

"I'm sorry I didn't come by sooner. There's so many things that have changed over the years and I guess I just got overwhelmed." He apologized.

"It's okay, I understand. I know it's a lot to take in." Felicity smiled gently, putting a hand on his forearm. "You're here now, and I'm glad."

With a soft smile, Oliver sighed, gathering courage for what he was about to do next. He didn't remember being this nervous the last time he did what he was about to do a little over 3 years ago. And this time, it wasn't even in the pursuit of a romantic relationship.

"I actually wanted to ask you something." Oliver said, looking down at her hand still on his arm.

Felicity nodded. "Sure. What can I do for you?"

He looked up and smiled softly. "Would you like to go get lunch together?"

Chuckling, Felicity nodded. "That sounds nice."

They ended up in a cute little burger joint in downtown Starling City. It had a retro theme with lots of red and white and chrome. They settled in one of the booths next to the window and Felicity recommended a double chili cheeseburger with extra fries. They talked about a lot of things while waiting for their food. Felicity told her how her life had changed since Meghan, about her promotion at work and random things he'd missed in his time away. In turn, Oliver told her a little bit about the island he'd been stranded on, Lian Yu, choosing to withhold the information about the people there and how they hurt him. He asked her questions about what it was like, being a parent, genuinely interested, but he never asked about the thing that he was aching to know. Was she dating his best friend? Was said best friend the father of her child? And if not, then who was? Oliver didn't want to be the one to ask for it, just like she didn't push for answers about his time away. He would tell her about that on his own accord and because he knew he was keeping his secrets, he allowed her to have her own. She would tell him once she was ready.

Oliver tensed up when Felicity's phone rang. The cheery ringtone was the same as some months ago at Queen Consolidated. He flinched at the sudden sound.

Felicity apologized quickly, glancing at the screen. "I'm sorry, I have to take this. It's Tommy, he's looking after Meghan today."

His shoulders tense, jaw shut tight, Oliver nodded slowly.

"I'm sorry, just give me one minute." Felicity said before sliding out of the booth and walking outside to take the call.

Oliver watched her chat with Tommy through the window, the worried crease between her eyebrows fading once she realized nothing terrible had happened. A smile cracked open her face as she ducked her head and chuckled, a soft blush appearing on her cheeks. Oliver knew he had no right, but the jealousy deep inside him grew stronger with the second. He was supposed to be making her laugh, making her happy and he wanted to kick himself for not being able to do just that. There was an invisible wall between them that would only crumble with time and patience.


	6. Parties & Pregnancies

_**November 18th, 2015** _

Life continued in Starling City. Oliver continued keeping his distance from Felicity but she was too busy with planning the world's most extravagant one year-old's birthday party, courtesy of Thea Queen. He'd come over to her apartment once or twice in the past week, and she'd caught him lingering in the doorway to Meghan's nursery, but he wouldn't talk when she'd tried to ask him about it. Felicity was quite sure Oliver had his suspicions about Meghan's paternity, he wasn't stupid, but he never asked about it. She saw that as a sign that he wasn't ready to be a parent if his suspicions were correct and he was the father. So, she didn't pressure him. This was his call to make.

She distracted herself with color palettes, balloon animals and princess impersonators. On a chilly Wednesday evening, her birthday party planners sat in her living room around the coffee table littered with pinterest-y DIY-ideas and lifestyle magazines. As Felicity sat cross-legged on the couch, feeding Meghan her bottle, Laurel and Sara discussed decorations. Thea was on the phone with the caterer in the kitchen, but her voice drifted over to the living room. It sounded like a heated argument. A little too heated for petit-fours and sandwiches, Felicity thought to herself. Thea had insisted they host her niece's party at the Queen Mansion, refusing to listen to Felicity's objections in regard to Oliver. She argued that just because Oliver didn't know he was Meghan's father, even if the girl wasn't supposed to have any relation to her, she still loved her. Very much so and she was gonna throw her the best birthday party ever regardless of her parentage.

Felicity hugged her almost sister-in-law very tightly after that, whispering her appreciation. With Oliver's return and work and looking after her daughter, she hadn't had time to plan a party. Thea swooping in had taken that weight off of her shoulders. For which she was very thankful. Thea also reminded her that even if Oliver wasn't ready to be a dad, she had a family who would always be there for her.

"So, princess Belle cancelled, do we still have Cinderella as a back-up?" Sara asked as she crossed out something on the check-list. Princess Belle most likely.

"No, but I just got confirmation for Ariel, instead." Laurel said, typing something on her phone.

Sara looked up from where she sat on the floor next to the coffee table. "Felicity, do we need a prince Eric to go with that?"

Felicity chuckled. She couldn't believe this was her life right now. Having her friends over to plan this ridiculous party. So much had changed since she'd become a mom. She caught herself getting ready for bed at the same time as her daughter, snacking on the baby cookies, watching Disney movies she hadn't seen in ages and children's cartoons that should not have held her twenty six year old brain's attention like they did and she even color coordinating their outfits without even noticing.

"That would be adorable, I can't lie." She said, smirking.

Sara's face lit up, she was just as excited about this as the five year-old kids from friends and co-workers invited to the party. "Good, because we get a twenty percent discount if we book two entertainers."

"Nice." Felicity laughed. No matter how much money Thea insisted on spending, Felicity could still never say no to a good deal. It was just in her blood, how she was raised. Why spend more money if there were other options.

"I have to admit, doing this with all of you is actually quite fun." She chuckled, putting Meghan's now empty bottle on the side table next to the couch. Meghan made a noise of protest, but as Felicity put her on her feet, little hands hanging on to the coffee table, she was quickly distracted by the colorful pages littering the surface.

Thea walked back into the living room, plopping down on the couch in exasperation. She blew her hair out of her face and tossed her phone down next to her. Felicity raised her eyebrows at her in question.

"The dumbass used the hazelnut praline when I specifically told him to stay away from anything containing nuts." She muttered, pulling her legs up under her. Felicity smiled gently at her, putting a hand on her shoulder.

Thea had caught Meghan's attention. The little girl wobbled over to her aunt, patting at her knees until the attention was reciprocated. Thea leaned forward, holding out her hands so Meghan could hold onto her, her tiny fists wrapped around a single finger.

"Oh what we do for you, little one." Thea cooed, wagging her fingers before pulling Meghan up into her lap, pressing kisses to her niece's cheeks, leaving the girl a giggling, squirming mess. Felicity watched with a smile until she saw a flash of hurt appear in Thea's eyes. She settled Meghan back into her lap, softly stroking the downy soft hair before turning to Felicity.

"Are you ever gonna tell him?" She asked quietly.

Felicity sighed. "I don't know. Do you think he's ready?"

Thea shrugged. "He's been back for a while now, he's adjusting, I can tell."

The room fell silent except for Meghan's occasional cooing. Felicity's gaze fell down to her hands for a moment before looking at her friends. Sara nodded slowly while Laurel smiled encouragingly.

Thea sighed. "I just want him to have this." She whispered, leaning down to kiss Meghan's hair. "She's such a happy little girl and it may be just what he needs to be happy. I know he can be an amazing father."

Felicity knew that too. She'd always known that. Oliver was the only person that could be Meghan's father. She nodded slowly.

"Okay." She said. "I'll tell him."

* * *

 

**_June 8th, 2014_ **

Taking a deep breath, Felicity walked into the main living area in the Queen Mansion after Raisa had let her in. The older woman had smiled at her gently, a sadness hidden behind her eyes that was supposed to be stuffed away because she was 'at work'. Felicity knew how much she was hurting too. She'd been like a second mother to Oliver. So, without caring for rules or regulations, Felicity hugged the older woman, silently thanking her for all she had done for him.

Moira Queen was sitting on a couch, looking out of the widow with a blank expression on her face. She was shrouded in black, still mourning her husband and son. Felicity's own dress probably seemed to bright and cheery, but it was the only thing that still fit. Moira didn't notice Felicity walking in until she walked over, softly clearing her throat.

"Mrs. Queen?" She asked, hands fidgeting with the strap on her shoulder bag.

Slowly, Moira turned around, a sad smile tugging at her lips when she saw Felicity.

"Felicity." She said softly. "How good to see you."

Moira stood up from the couch to hug her almost daughter-in-law in greeting. The two women held onto each other for a long time, both really needing the comfort. When they pulled apart, Felicity's face stood serious.

"Do you have time to talk? It's important." She asked quietly

Nodding, Moira took Felicity's hand. "Of course, dear. Are you alright? Did something happen?"

A huff of air escaped from Felicity's lips in her nervous laughter. She blinked a couple of times to keep herself from bursting into tears.

"No, nothing happened. I'm fine, really. I just have something to tell you."

Moira motioned for them to sit down, never letting go of Felicity's hand. Her son had always had a questionable taste in women, beautiful but lacking in the brain department. He'd been wild and unwilling to settle down even though he was getting a little bit older and starting to outgrow is boyish antics. That had all changed when Felicity had walked into his life. Oliver wanted to settle down and start a family. He was becoming a responsible adult, took his job at the company seriously. Moira would forever be grateful for that. Felicity would always be a part of their family, even if Oliver never even got the chance to propose.

"Okay. So, most importantly, I need you to know that I'm not doing this for money, or status or anything. I can handle myself financially and I know what the press are gonna say, that I did this to insure myself a comfortable life, but I just need you to know that this is not some ploy I masterminded." Felicity spat it out as quickly as she could, not giving Moira the chance to interrupt.

The older woman just frowned. "Felicity, dear, whatever it is, I know you would never do such things. You're too honest for that. That's why my son loved you."

Felicity gulped at the use of the past tense for the word love, but Moira was right. Taking a deep breath, tucking her bottom lip between her teeth she looked her in the eye.

"I'm pregnant." She whispered, her voice breaking. "It's Oliver's child."

Moira's eyes went wide, mouth opening and closing in shock as she processed the news. Tears dripped down her cheeks, just like they did down Felicity's. Oliver was gone but not completely, she was carrying a piece of him inside of her and if that made the loss worse or less devastating, Felicity wasn't sure yet, but by the way Moira pulled her into her arms and quietly sobbed she knew she had an ally in all of this.


	7. Romance & Celebrations

_**November 22 nd, 2015** _

The day of the party, everything went just as smoothly as expected. It had taken some serious party planning, but everything was perfect. There wasn’t an hors d’oeuvre containing nuts anywhere on the premises and the Disney impersonators where the highlight of the event. The Queen mansion bustled with children from friends and co-workers, the walls decorated with pastel streamers and balloons, an extravagant buffet and a cake that was a pure piece of art in itself.

It wasn’t until early on in the evening when the sky started darkening and most of the guests had gone home, that Felicity finally had some time to sit down. She was exhausted, plopping down on the couch without a care, putting her aching feet up on the coffee table. She loved wearing heels but on days like this she surely wished she hadn’t chosen to wear them. Closing her eyes for a moment, she allowed herself to relax for the first time that day.

She didn’t open them again until the couch dipped beside her. Her eyelids fluttered open to see a smiling Oliver had come to sit next to her, a squirming Meghan in his arms. She seen him around a couple times before that day, mostly hanging around her daughter, keeping an eye on her, but they hadn’t really had the chance to talk. Whenever she wanted to go over to him, there was something, or someone that wanted her attention. There were candles to be blown out, gifts to be opened et cetera, et cetera. Now that he was sitting next to her, with her little girl in his arms, Felicity couldn’t help but think about how right it looked seeing them together. How right it felt.

“Hi.” He said softly, letting Meghan grab his hand to play with it. She was fascinated by it as only a one year-old could be.

Felicity tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and smiled sleepily. “Hi.”

She reached out to stroke Meghan’s cheek, making her giggle.

“Thank you for being here today.” She said softly. “It means a lot.”

Oliver smiled and nodded. “No problem. Besides, I didn’t really have a choice. We’re at my house.”

Chuckling, Felicity shook her head. “Take it up with Thea. It was her idea.”

They both laughed and almost instinctively, Felicity reached for his free hand, squeezing it gently as a way to thank him. Their gazes met, and they just stared at each other for a moment until Meghan started fussing.  The wailing that erupted from the little girl caught Felicity’s attention first. She immediately reached for her, already whispering soothing words as she pulled her into her arms.

Oliver watched as Felicity’s soft expression contorted into one of disgust. “Smells like someone needs a diaper change.” She muttered.

Raisa, who’d started the clean-up after the party had ended, walked past right behind the couch they were sitting on in that moment, immediately volunteering to change Meghan. So Felicity could take a moment for herself.

“Oh, no. You really don’t have to do that.” Felicity protested, she didn’t want Raisa to have to clean up literal poop after the already enormous mess the party had left.

“No, no! I insist. You take a moment to relax, Miss Felicity.” Raisa said with the lilt of her Russian accent.

Felicity considered her offer for a moment before handing her smelly daughter to the older woman. She couldn’t deny that it was nice not having to deal with dirty diapers for a second. Relaxing back into the couch as Raisa went upstairs to chance Meghan, Felicity let out a deep sigh, letting her eyes fall shut.

When she opened them again, she saw Oliver was watching her with a soft smile on his face. Unashamed, she stared right back at him. The lines carved into his face, the shadow his stubble cast across his chin and cheeks. The piercing blue of his eyes.

“I missed you so much.” She whispered, putting a hand on his forearm.

Oliver’s eyes softened as he leaned closer. She saw his Adam’s apple bob up and down as he gulped before whispering back to her. “I could’ve endured five more years on that island if only I could’ve seen you for a moment.”

Felicity’s hand clutched at his shirt as his words registered with her, tears stinging behind her eyes. She realized just how close he was, just mere inches hovering over her, their breaths mingling. Her grip on him tightened, tugging him even closer as her lips parted on their own accord. His gaze dropped to her lips, and she couldn’t help but do the same. When their eyes met again, the blue in his was a shade or two darker. Felicity took a deep, unsteady breath as his fingers trailed down her cheek and lingered under her chin. Until they tilted her head up and his lips brushed over hers in a feather light touch. He was warm, gentle, lips a little bit chapped but soft.  Felicity’s hand moved to his collar, pulling him closer as their lips moved together. Her heart swelled, butterflies fluttering in her stomach.

Until he pulled away. She slowly opened her eyes, immediately recognizing the distress in his eyes.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done that.” He apologized, sitting back, scooting away from her.

Felicity shook her head, not letting go of him so easily. “Oliver, no, stop. I’ve wanted you to do that ever since you came back.” She said, putting a hand on his cheek.

He looked up with wide eyes, before frowning in confusion. “But what about Tommy?” He asked.

Now it was her turn to be confused. “What about him?”

“Aren’t you two… you know… together?”

Felicity’s eyes went wide in disbelief. “What? No! He’s engaged to Laurel.”

Suddenly, she felt very awake. “Is that why you’ve been so distant? Because you thought Tommy and I were a thing?”

He nodded, and if Oliver Queen was able to blush, he just might have been doing it in that moment. “I just figured, since he was always around, helping out with Meghan and stuff.”

Felicity let her thumb stroke through the stubble on his cheek. She sat up a little, scooting closer to him, gaze locking with his.

“Oh, Oliver.” She murmured. “You’re the man I love. You always have been, and always will.”

He’s smiling then, wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her into his lap. She’s smiling too, hands holding onto his face as she leans closer.

“I love you too, Felicity.” He whispers against her lips before closing the distance between them.

They’re kissing again, passionately so. And all is well in the world. For about thirty minutes.

 

* * *

 

_**February 14 th 2014** _

It was their first valentine’s day as a couple. And as much as Oliver was happy about that fact, he was also terrified that, in one way or another, he would screw it up. The year before, they’d been separated by roughly a thousand miles while Felicity was in New York City for business, so they hadn’t been able to celebrate the holiday properly. Oliver intended to make this year extra special.

He’d gone home from work early. Or well, home, as in Felicity’s town house. That place had been more of a home to him than the mansion had ever been.  He’d called Felicity, asking her to pick up some things from the grocery store before meeting him at her place. It was all to stall her.

Cooking had never been his strong suit, so after he’d burnt his second chicken cordon-blue, he’d called Raisa in for help. While she was in the kitchen, Oliver got to decorating. He cut a bouquet of Roses, putting them in a vase on the side table in the hall, the first thing Felicity would see when she’d walk in. He lit candles all around the dining room and littered a path or rose petals from the door to her chair. He even thought about proposing that night, but decided it was better to wait until his relationship with his dad would be a little bit better so she wouldn’t feel unwelcoming. Oliver knew Felicity didn’t want to stand in the way between him and his father. She had always been clear about that. It had been the main reason why she hadn’t wanted to be in a relationship with him in the first place.

But, now it was time for happy thoughts. After Raisa left, with detailed instructed for the finishing touches on desert, Oliver only had half an hour left to perfect the rich chocolate mousse with raspberries.

“Oliver?” He heard Felicity call out after the familiar sound of the key sliding into the lock of the front door and the little creak as it opened. “I’m home!”

Smiling to himself, he finished off the last wisp of whipped-cream before wiping his hands on his jeans and walking out of her little kitchen to greet her.

He found her staring into the candlelit living room with disbelief on her face, the bag of groceries almost slipping from her fingers.

“What is all this?” She asked in a soft voice.

Oliver walked up behind her, taking the groceries out of her hands, putting them to the side before wrapping his arms around her from behind, pressing a kiss to her neck.

“Happy Valentine’s day, Felicity.” He whispered, moving his lips to kiss her temple.

She sighed, leaning back into him. “Oh Oliver, you didn’t have to do this.”

Turning around in his arms, she smiles up at him, cupping his cheek before lifting up on her tiptoes to kiss him sweetly.

“It’s the first Valentine’s we get to spend together. I wanted it to be special.” Oliver said, nudging her nose with his.

She was quiet for a moment, looking up at him like she could see their future in his eyes. And she could. It was all right there in the icy blue pools. The white dress and the black tux. A porch swing and wrinkly hands. Little kids giggling as they run through the backyard on a hot summer day.

“I love you, Oliver.” She whispered, wrapping her arms around his shoulders.

Oliver smiled, pulling her a little tighter against him. “I love you too, Felicity. So much.”

They kissed again, and they would have completely forgotten about dinner and headed straight for the bedroom if it hadn’t been for the timer to go off. The chicken was ready to be served.

What they didn’t know, and what Felicity would find out 11 weeks later on Oliver’s birthday, that that was the day their future together truly began. The day their family grew a little. True, the circumstances weren’t what they’d always imagined, but the little girl Felicity carried would always be a reminder of the happy times they had and the even more wonderful times they had wanted. Felicity did everything she could to make sure Meghan had everything Oliver would want for her.


	8. Give & Take

_**November 22 nd, 2015** _

Felicity lifted her head off of Oliver’s shoulder and looked at her watch. Raisa had taken Meghan for her diaper change exactly 32 minutes ago. She and Oliver had been talking, and kissing, a lot. They talked about how Moira had helped out while Felicity was pregnant. How she had taken care of her, and made sure she knew she was still a part of the family. Thea too. Felicity bit her lip as she looked around the room, peering into the foyer for a sign of them. She had this feeling in her stomach, something she’d come to recognize as her maternal instinct. Something wasn’t right.

“Everything okay? You’re doing that wrinkly thing with your eyebrows.” Oliver asked, putting a hand on her shoulder.

Felicity shook her head a little and looked up at him. “Yeah, It’s nothing.”

Oliver raised his eyebrows. “Felicity…”

She sighed. “I don’t know.  Something feels off. It’s almost too quiet.”

It was.  The house had completely drained from guests, leaving nobody but the Queen family, Felicity and Meghan, Raisa, and the bodyguard, John Diggle, who, like Raisa, had worked for the Queens for years.

“I’m just gonna check on Meghan.” She muttered, pushing off the couch.

Oliver did the same. “I’ll come with you.” He said.

Felicity’s eyes widened in surprise before a soft smile of appreciation curled on her lips. With Oliver’s hand on the small of her back, they walked up the stairs and into the nursery Moira had set up when Meghan was born.

She’d been there just hours ago, to give her daughter the bottle she’d pumped early that morning, but the room looked nothing like the bright pastel happy place she’d left behind. The room was dark. And cold. A lamp was knocked over, the bulb flickering against the carpet. The ultimate firehazard. The floor was littered with glass from a broken window, the curtains billowing from the cold wintery breeze.

Felicity froze in the doorway, her heart hammering in her chest. Her instincts had been correct. Her eyes moved around the room, looking for Meghan’s sparkly purple princess dress or a sign of a wisp of her dark hair. There was nothing.

“Meghan!” She cried out, running into the room. From the broken window, she cried out into the night. She cut her hand on shards of glass but she didn’t care. Tears were running down her face as she stumbled to Meghan’s crib, hands grabbing the bars, leaving a bloody stain as she peered inside. Her baby wasn’t there. She screamed, legs buckling underneath her. She felt Oliver’s hands on her shoulders, and she could hear the faint low hum of his voice but she couldn’t make out what he was saying.

Next to her, Oliver moved, roughly brushing past her as she sat there, slumped against her daughter’s crib, completely in shock, hands trembling, silent tears trickling down her cheeks. Her gaze followed him as he knelt down in the middle of the room, hovering over something. Someone. A body.

Felicity’s brain started working again. Raisa. She crawled towards the woman lying unconscious on the floor and watched Oliver press two fingers to her pulse. She grabbed his arm as they waited and could see the relief on his face when he finally found it.

“Oh thank god.” She whispered through her tears, resting her head against Oliver’s shoulders.

“She’s gonna be fine, it’s just a bump on her head.” Oliver said quietly, wrapping his arms around her, hauling her against him.

Felicity gasped for air, crying hysterically, clutching at Oliver’s shirt.

“Meghan’s gone, Oliver! Someone took her. Someone took our daughter.” She cried.

When Oliver’s arms stiffened around her, Felicity realized exactly what she’d just let slip out of her mouth in her hysteria.

“She’s your daughter. I should’ve told you sooner, I’m so sorry. I didn’t know how you’d take it.” Felicity sobbed, ugly tears mixed with mascara and her bloody fingers staining his shirt. He didn’t care.

His mind was reeling. Meghan is his daughter, his child. A product of him and Felicity. Of the love they have for each other. His heart swelled at the revelation, but the crash that came a moment after was vicious. It all made sense now and he felt incredibly stupid for not figuring it out sooner. A pang ran through his chest. Someone took his daughter. His little girl.

He moved his hands to cup Felicity’s cheek, pulling her away from him so he could look at her. A sad but determined smile on his face.

“Hey. Felicity, look at me.” He whispered.

Her gaze met his, her bottom-lip trembling as she reached out to hold onto his wrists, fingers covered in tears and dried up blood.

“She’s my daughter. I’m gonna get her back. I promise.”  He said, determination in his voice.

His calm and  steady voice was exactly what Felicity needed in that moment. He’d always been the rock she’d held onto, but never as much as she did now. She reached up to cup his cheek, a fresh wave of tears slipping from her eyes.

“You were so distant and I didn’t want to pressure you into something you weren’t ready for. Now she’s gone and it’s all my fault. Oliver, I’m so sorry.” She cried, burying her head in his chest again.

“Shh.” Oliver murmured, wrapping his arms around her. “It’s gonna be okay. I know exactly who took her.”

 

* * *

 

**_November 22 nd, 2014_ **

Felicity couldn’t take her eyes off of her. The little bundle wrapped in a pink blanket sleeping in her arms. She was perfect. Each of the ten little fingers, her plump pink lips and her tiny toes. The little girl yawned, stretching out her arms, hand touching her mother’s cheek. Felicity blinked away tears as she reached for her daughter’s hand, pressing the softest of kisses against her fingers. She wished Oliver was there with them. With his family.

Carefully, she put her baby girl in the crib next to her hospital bed. She made little noises of protest, almost convincing Felicity to just keep her in her arms, but she had something to do. Despite her exhaustion and desire to be with her daughter, there was one thing she needed to do first.

Sighing, Felicity reached for the notebook and pen lying atop her bedside table. She sat back against the pillows and opened it almost halfway.

 _Dear Oliver,_ she wrote.

_Our daughter was born today. She’s absolutely beautiful, perfect in every way. She has the same blue eyes as you had. So beautiful. I miss you so much. Every day. But today it’s extra hard that you’re not here to share this moment with me. You would love her so much, I know you would._

When she was pregnant, she had sought out a therapist. Not because she thought she would go crazy, or a doctor had recommended it to her, but because she needed someone to talk to who wasn’t in any part involved in the story. Someone who would listen objectively and without prejudice. Felicity needed someone to help her through this. She found that in Doctor Green, A nice woman in her thirties who specialized in loss and post-partum depression. Felicity had had her fair share of loss and quite frankly wanted to prevent spiraling into depression after her baby was born. Doctor Green suggested writing down her feelings. In whatever way Felicity saw fit.

So, Felicity started writing letters. To Oliver, to her unborn daughter, to herself. She all kept it in a notebook. A collection of things that happened during her pregnancy. She included pictures of her growing stomach and sonograms of the baby’s development. She made sure to write down everything so that if Oliver came back one day, he could read it and not have missed a thing.

_The labor was exhausting and painful, and it took so long, but that all doesn’t seem to matter now that she’s here. Your mother and Thea were here to support me, and my mother too. They all cried. I cried too. I still have trouble believing this is real life._

_When I heard about the Gambit sinking, my world collapsed. You were my world, Oliver. I wasn’t sure I could continue living without you. And then, our little girl came into my life. She gave me hope. She gave me you. She’s a part of you and I’m forever thankful I didn’t have to lose you completely._

_I will tell her about you. Tell her what an incredible man her father was, that he still is because I have hope that you’re not completely gone. Call me crazy, but I have faith that you will find your way home to me. It’s this feeling deep down in my gut that I can’t seem to shake, no matter what I do. Prove me right, please._

_Come home to your family._

_All my undying love, Felicity._

She would never be able to love anyone as much as she loved Oliver. She knew that. A tiny little noise caught her attention. She reached over into the crib to gently rub her daughter’s stomach until she settled back into sleep. With a soft sigh to encourage herself, Felicity turned back to her notebook. Silent tears dripped down onto the paper as Felicity wrote her last sentence.

_Ps. Her name is Meghan Olivia Queen._


	9. Deals & Discoveries

_**November 23 rd, 2015** _

It was just past one in the morning. Oliver was still waiting, like he had been for over an hour now. He knew she was coming. She wouldn’t have sent him that message if she wasn’t. Amanda Waller may be the devil, but she didn’t  come back on agreements they made. The area was quiet save for the occasional noise of a train rushing by in the distance. Oliver took a deep breath, fumbling with the usb drive in his pocket.

The wintery cold was creeping through his jacket, setting into his bones, but Oliver wasn’t cold. He’d lived through colder nights than this, without the protection of outerwear.  He waited patiently, now and then shifting his weight from one foot to the other, hands firmly clasped behind his back as his eyes flitted across the abandoned road out on the edge of the city.

After he’d calmed down Felicity enough to get her back downstairs to the living room, and John had helped him carry Raisa down as well it was time to make a plan. He cleaned the cuts on Felicity’s hands methodically, murmuring soothing words to her while she did her very best not to break down in tears. She was in shock, he knew that. But, he also knew she would do whatever it would take to get her daughter back. And that was all that mattered now. Getting Meghan back to her mother.

Raisa woke up about twenty minutes after they’d brought her downstairs, immediately apologizing a million times for not being able to call out for help or protecting Meghan. Felicity sniffled quietly as Oliver asked the older woman to explain, in as much detail as she could, what exactly had happened.

Two men, dressed in black uniforms, heavily armed. Meghan started crying when they broke through the windows. Raisa had put herself between the men and the baby but they knocked her out with the butt of a gun. Then everything went black.

Sighing deeply, Oliver shook his head. Waller was definitely behind this. Raisa gave the perfect description of two ARGUS agents. He turned to his family and did something he had hoped he would never have to do.

He told them everything.

He explained what happened to him after the Gambit went down. The time he’d spent on the island and in China and then Coast City. How he’d chosen to come back home to escape Waller’s plan for him to work for her again. He came clean about all of it. They were angry at first, and in shock, especially Thea, knowing that he could’ve come home sooner, but the fear for Meghan’s life pushed that anger to the side. For now. Felicity sat quietly to the side, her head reeling from the newly uncovered information. She’d been right about Hong Kong. She’d been right all along.

Oliver turned to Felicity, kneeling down in front of the couch she was sitting on. He put a hand over hers where they lay clasped together in her lap, his other hand moving to cup her cheek.

“We’re gonna get her back, Felicity, I promise you.” He murmured encouragingly.

Her head shot up, fire in her eyes. “Don’t for a second think that I’m gonna allow you to hand yourself over, Oliver.” She spat.

“I don’t care about my life, Felicity. I need to get our daughter back to safety. If that means a trade, I will make it.” He said sternly.

She shook her head slowly, unclasping her hands to hold onto his.

“Over my dead body. I’m not losing you again. There has to be a another way.”

Oliver took a deep breath. There was something that could work, but it was a long shot. With trading himself for Meghan out of the question, it was worth the try.

“Okay.” He nodded. “But I’m going to need your help, with something totally illegal. Can you do that for me?”

Her eyes met his, determination in the blue pools and she nodded again. “Yes. Whatever it takes to get her back.”

So, they got to work. With Felicity behind the elaborate computer system Oliver had set up in his room, just in case, and Oliver telling her exactly what he’d found and what else he needed to build a case with enough leverage that would persuade Amanda to let him go freely. It was then that the devil herself texted him to meet her at the edge of the Glades, probably the most dangerous and deserted part of town. Alone.  Felicity didn’t want him to go alone, and John definitely didn’t want to let him go unarmed.

“I can handle myself.” Oliver muttered, thumbing the usb drive Felicity had just pulled out of the computer. It was still hot. “Besides, If Waller knows I’m carrying a gun, or bringing back-up, she won’t make the deal.”

So, he was out there by himself, waiting for the black SUV to appear at the end of the street.

 

* * *

 

_**February 20 th, 2015** _

“Tommy, please listen to me, I’m telling you, it’s him.” Felicity begged through the phone, struggling to balance a crying baby girl in one and the tiny device in the other. She clamped the phone between her cheek and her shoulder as she gently rocked Meghan from side to side to get her to fall back asleep.

“Felicity. That’s insane. Oliver can’t be alive. And even if he was, how the hell did he get to Hong Kong?” Tommy reasoned, a hint of desperation and hopelessness in his voice. Felicity knew she was opening old wounds but she couldn’t just do nothing with the evidence she’d found.

She sighed and rolled her eyes. “Well, the Gambit did go down in the North China Sea. It’s not like he’s popping up in South Africa.”

Tommy let out a long breath and Felicity could practically see him running his hand up and down his face.

“Alright. I’m coming over.”

Felicity sighed with relief. “Thank you Tommy.”

About an hour later, Felicity had finally managed to put Meghan down for her afternoon nap. Brushing the stray hair falling out of her bun behind her ears she sat down on the on the couch. Tommy was browsing the files she’d laid out on the coffee table. String of code and digital footprints what she thought to be Oliver, had left behind. A screenshot of the green dot indicating that he had been online and even the drafted email he’d half typed out.

She waited patiently for Tommy to look through all of it, nervously fumbling with her hands as he was thumbing through the pages.

“How did you even find all this?” He asked after a long moment of silence.

Felicity’s tongue darted out to wet her lips before she started explaining.  “I was working up a report for the new Applied Sciences division for Mr. Steele this morning. I got an email, I don’t remember who it was from I never even got the chance to properly look because that’s when the notification popped up that Oliver, or someone using his account, had logged into his email.”

She was really glad right now that she was able to do most of her work from home, with a new baby and all. Moira had worked it out with HR, making it easier for Felicity to juggle both work and motherhood.

“I still knew his password so I logged in to check. I found that sitting in his drafts.” She pointed at the half-finished email. ‘mom, I’m alive. I’m in Ho’ it said.

From her home office, she could remotely log into the QC database, but it also protected the company from the possible harm of the lengths she went to next. She back traced the signal across several servers and found the IP-address that had been used to write it.

“The email was written in Hong Kong. He’s there, Tommy. He’s alive.”  She said, putting a hand on Tommy’s shoulder, trying to convince him that she was right about this. She could just feel  it in her bones.

He sighed. “Alright, I believe you.”

And so, Tommy booked the first flight out to Hong Kong in an attempt to find his best friend.


	10. Leverage & Letdowns

**_November 23 rd, 2015_ **

He saw the bright red heels before the woman who wore them. The gravel creaked under her soles  as she gracefully stepped out of the car. Huddled in a thick winter coat, Amanda Waller walked purposefully towards him.

“Mr. Queen.” She said in greeting, tiny smirk on her red lips. “How wonderful of you to show up.”

Oliver bit back a growl. “Where is she?!”  He demanded, stepping closer in his anger, alarming the two agents on either side of Waller. Oliver fell back before they could reach for their gun.

Amanda made a disapproving clicking noise with her tongue. “The child is safe, no need for the hostility.”

She clasped her hands in front of her. “Tell me, were you surprised to learn you were a father? I have a feeling you’ve known about dear little Meghan’s existence for a while now.”

Oliver glared at her. “Let’s skip to the part where you kidnapped an innocent little girl to get to me.”

“It worked, didn’t it.” Amanda smirked, tilting her head to the side in provocation.

He scoffed and shook his head. “I’m not working for you, Waller.”

She chuckled in amusement. “And why not, Mr. Queen.”

“Because I have something you want more.” Oliver said, fishing the data key out of his pocket and twirling it between his fingers.

“Evidence.” He stated. “Enough to put a stop to a manmade earthquake from leveling half of Starling City.”

Amanda stiffened before trying to play it off, shrugging and crossing her arms over her chest. “Why don’t you just take it to the police, then?”

“SCPD would immediately question the legality of how this information was obtained. That’s attention and scrutiny that I don’t need and I know ARGUS  has always been more act now, ask questions later.”

She didn’t say anything for a long moment, thinking over what he was offering. He knew she had to take the deal. Even if she wasn’t the most morally good person to ever live, there was no way she was going to trade thousands of lives and the destruction of almost half of Starling City just because she wanted him as her pet project for some still unknown reason.

“Do your job, Amanda. Protect this city.” He spat.

Waller narrowed her eyes. “I’ll need to verify the information first.”

Oliver shook his head. “I need to see my daughter before I give you anything.”

She turned to one of her guards. “get the girl.”

Oliver tried not to let her see his relief too much, but he couldn’t hold back the tiny little sigh that escaped from his lips. His heart was beating in his chest as the guard walked to the car, pulling the door open and reaching inside. He returned with, from the distance, an unharmed but little red-faced from crying, Meghan strapped into a car seat. The agent put it down next to Amanda’s feet.

“So, who’s trying to destroy the city and murder thousands of people?” She asked with a smirk.

Oliver tore his gaze from his daughter to look at her, taking a deep breath.

“Malcolm Merlyn.”

“Oh!” Amanda chuckled. “You’re selling out your best friend’s father?”

“He never was a good father to Tommy.” Oliver muttered, eyes moving back down to Meghan, who’d started fussing in her seat, obviously having recognized him.

“And you are? A good father?” She asked.

“I’m trying to be.” Oliver said simply.

“Well then I suppose you should hand over that data key so you can take your daughter home.” Amanda said, holding out her hand.

Taking a deep breath, Oliver flipped the usb drive in his hand one more time before walking over to her and dropping the thing in her outstretched hand.

“Pleasure doing business with you, Mr. Queen.” Amanda said with a smirk on her face.

The words barely registered with him because his sole focus was his baby girl. He knelt down in front of her and unclasped the straps of the car seat, pulling her up in his arms. He pressed a kiss to her forehead before smoothing down her curls. Unzipping his coat, he huddled her inside to keep her from the biting cold.

“I don’t think I have to tell you what happens if the intel is unusable.” Amanda said.

“You’ll know where to find me if it is.” He said back defiantly. “But don’t ever touch my daughter again.”

With a satisfied smirk, Amanda turned on her heel and headed back to the black SUV. Oliver turned his attention to Meghan, holding her small hand in his to keep it warm. The little girl rested her head against his chest. He looked up when he realized Amanda was staring at them.

“Please thank Miss Smoak for me, her assistance has been greatly appreciated. Maybe I should be aiming to recruit her instead.”

Oliver gulped, watching the car door fall shut as the engine of the large car revved up and they disappeared into the night. Meghan clutched at his shirt. She started shivering.  She was still wearing the dress she wore at her birthday party and not much else, she must have been freezing. Oliver wrapped his coat around her a little tighter, pressing another kiss to her forehead.

“It’s okay, baby. You’re gonna be okay. You’re safe now. I got you.”

* * *

 

**_February 23 th, 2015_ **

At around six in the morning, Felicity got a phone call from Tommy in Hong Kong. He apologized immediately when he realized how early it was for her, not considering the time difference, but the phone call couldn’t wait. Besides, Felicity was already up because Meghan was up. She didn’t even need to set an alarm nowadays. With Meghan nursing, she’d picked up the phone and Tommy launched into everything that had happened.

“I got kidnapped in my hotel room. Woke up in some kind of empty warehouse with this guy in a ski-mask. He wouldn’t step into my line of sight but that’s what I saw when he ran away after the cops barged in.”

Felicity gasped quietly. “Tommy are you alright? Did he hurt you?”

“I’m fine, Felicity, really. I’m at the airport right now. I’m not staying here a minute longer. Apart from my wrists which are a little bruised from being tied up, I’m fine.”

Meghan let go of Felicity’s breast, contorting her face in discomfort before hiccupping.

Clamping the phone between her shoulder and her ear, Felicity pulled down her shirt and  adjusted Meghan in her arms, resting her against her chest, before the little girl even had the chance to complain again. “What did he even want?”

Felicity gently patted Meghan’s back to help her burp, shoulder protected by a towel against any spit up as she listened to Tommy.

“Money, I think. He said something about how hacking into a dead billionaire’s email to leave a cryptic message would be sure to lure someone rich or important out to Hong Kong. He said he’d expected it to be Moira or Thea, but he was satisfied with me, because of my dad.”

Felicity frowned. “That’s weird. The account didn’t show any signs of  tampering or malware commonly used for hacking. And I would know.  And you didn’t recognize his voice? Sounds to me like he’s a Starling City local instead of Chinese if he knows that much about the people who live here.”

“No, I’m sorry, he used some kind of modulator. Whoever it was, it sure wasn’t Oliver. I’m sorry Felicity.” Tommy apologized, the connection between their two phones crackling a little.

She sighed and shook her head. “It’s not your fault. I’m sorry I got you into this mess. You could’ve been seriously hurt and that would’ve been my fault.”

“Felicity. I can make my own decisions. And I’m fine, so don’t worry about it.” There was a noise that interrupted Tommy’s sentence. She thought she heard him say something to a person near to him before turning back to the phone. “Alright, I gotta go, my plane is boarding.”

Felicity sighed in defeat. “Okay, have a safe flight, I’ll see you soon.”

“See you soon, Bye Felicity.” Tommy said.

“Oh, and Tommy?” Felicity asked.

“Yes?”

Felicity smiled to herself. “Thank you. For doing this for me.”

“No problem. If there’s a chance my best friend is still alive, I’m gonna find him.” There was a sadness in his voice that Felicity hadn’t heard before. Tommy had wanted it to be true as much as she had.

With a gentle smile on her face and a few last whispered words of goodbye, Felicity hung up the phone.

It had all been a sham, a ploy to lure someone rich to clammy Hong Kong in an attempt to kidnap them for ransom. Felicity felt incredibly guilty for asking Tommy to go and find Oliver. Tommy didn’t blame her, she knew that, but he could’ve been hurt, or worse, killed and it would’ve been because she had a stupid idea. She’d asked him to go because she couldn’t leave Meghan. She was only three months old and she couldn’t miss her baby that long. Even if it was only a couple of days.

After she’d hung up, basking in the silence that overcame the house except for Meghan’s occasional hiccup, Felicity let the tears escape from her eyes. All the hope that had blossomed deep inside her when she found the drafted email crashed down on her, crushing her soul and any belief that Oliver could possibly still be alive. Lifting her daughter off of her shoulder, she hugged her extra tight that morning, pressing kisses to the girl’s forehead as her tears flowed freely.

“I don’t think dad is gonna come home, baby.” She cried.


	11. Coming Home & Packing Up

**_November 23 rd, 2015_ **

“Oh my god!” Felicity gasped as she saw the headlights of Oliver’s car appear at the end of the driveway. She’d been staring out the window for hours, anxious for his and Meghan’s return. It had started raining a while ago, which had Felicity even more worried. It couldn’t be a good sign, could it? It was almost four in the morning, Thea had already passed out on the couch but Felicity knew she wouldn’t be able to get even a blink of sleep until she had her daughter back in her arms.

She barely had enough self-control to wait for Oliver to park the car before sprinting outside to meet them halfway. Once he killed the engine, Felicity rushed away from the window and to the front door, swinging it open, breath getting stuck in her throat as she saw Oliver walk over, whispering to the little bundle huddled under his coat.

He looked up at her with a smile. “I’ve got her.”  He whispered, closing the distance between them, stepping under the overhang, out of the rain.

Felicity’s bottom lip started trembling. “Oh thank god.” She sighed in relief.

At that moment, Meghan peeked out of Oliver jacket, having recognized her mom’s voice. The little girl immediately reached for Felicity, struggling free of Oliver’s hold. Felicity stepped over the threshold into the cold night air and pulled her daughter into her arms, tears of relief trickling down her cheek. Carefully, Oliver nudged her back inside so they wouldn’t get cold.

Closing the door behind him, he shed his dripping coat and before he could even move to put it away, Felicity had wrapped an arm around his waist and pressed herself against him. Her head resting against his shoulder, he dropped his coat on the floor and wrapped his arms around her and Meghan.

“Thank you, Oliver.” Felicity whispered between kisses she pressed to Meghan’s hair.

Oliver reached out to cup Felicity’s cheek and smiled gently at her. She immediately curled into his touch, placing her own hand over his. “She’s our daughter, what else would I have done.” He murmured.

Felicity sniffled, a watery smile appearing on her face before she reached up on her tiptoes to press a kiss to his lips. His hand moved from her cheek to around her shoulders, pulling her and Meghan tightly against him. Felicity pressed her forehead against his when they parted before pulling her attention back to the sleepy one year-old in her arms, almost forgetting not to crush her too tightly to her chest. Meghan was home safe and sound and Oliver didn’t have to sacrifice himself to get her back. The relief that rushed through her in that moment was unmeasurable. And the way Oliver held her. That gave her hope that maybe he was ready for this. Maybe he could be the father to Meghan she always dreamed of him to be. Maybe he already was.

Oliver pressed a kiss into her hair, rubbing soothing circles over her back, free hand smoothing down Meghan’s hair as the little girl clutched at her mother. They were a family, there was no doubt about it.

Later that night – or morning, depending on how you looked at it-  when the adrenaline had subsided a little and the exhaustion began to set in, Oliver and Felicity put Meghan to bed. The little girl wouldn’t let go of her mother so they decided to lay down with her, in Oliver’s bed at the mansion, with the sleepy baby girl curled up between them. Oliver held Felicity’s hand as they watched Meghan sleep, her small chest rising and falling with each breath.

Felicity gently ran her fingers over her daughter’s soft downy hair  as she slept, occasionally pressing a kiss to her forehead or rubbing her stomach when she began to fuss in her slumber.

Oliver watched her, amazed to see the woman he loved like this. He knew being a mother had changed her but the job itself seemed to come as natural as breathing. She knew exactly what to do when Meghan stirred and fussed.

“She gets cramps when she’s stressed.” Felicity whispered, soothingly massaging Meghan’s stomach as her little face scrunched up in discomfort.

Pressing her lips into a firm line, Felicity closed her eyes for a moment. “She’s been through a lot of stress in only a few hours.” She sighed.

Oliver looked down at their entwined hands and let out a breath of air he didn’t know he’d been holding.

“I’m sorry.” He murmured.

Felicity looked up at him, confusion in her eyes, eyebrows knitting together. “For what?”

He smiled weakly. “This is my fault. I should have known better than to lead Amanda right to everyone I care about. It was stupid to think she would just let me go.”

Squeezing her hand, he looked at Meghan’s sleeping form, a small sad smile tugging at his lips.

“Oh Oliver…” Felicity sighed. “Don’t blame yourself, please. Don’t carry the weight of the world on your shoulders,  that’s not your responsibility.” She let go of his hand to cup his cheek, thumb gently stroking through his stubble.

“I should be the one apologizing. I should have told you sooner that Meghan was your daughter. I didn’t want to pressure you, you’d been through so much already. I was gonna tell you, I had a plan, but then that Waller woman took her and I just…” Felicity took a staggering breath, words unsteady on her tongue as she recalled the memory of not knowing where her baby girl was and if she was safe. She looked away for a moment, needing the reassurance that Meghan was still right there in her arms.

She didn’t look back up until Oliver put a hand on her shoulder. “It’s okay.” He whispered with a gentle smile.

He sighed. “I think part of me didn’t want to know. I think I was afraid of the responsibility. I’ve done things I’m not proud of and I wouldn’t ever want to taint her with that.”

“I can’t believe you thought me and Tommy were a thing.” Felicity whispered, amusement and confusion on her face, a sparkle of intrigue in her eyes.

He let out a breathy laughed and shook his head a little.

“I would have understood, if you were. Tommy’s a good guy, handsome too, and I was… well, dead. I would’ve been happy as long as you were happy.”

Felicity smiled gently, a slight blush brightening up her face in the dim light. “I am happy.”

Oliver smiled back at her, taking her hand and softly squeezing her fingers. “Good.”

The cellphone Oliver had put on the nightstand earlier started buzzing, three short beeps, vibrations loud against the wood of the piece of furniture. The mood in the room shifted immediately, from relieved happiness to a nervous tension in mere seconds. Oliver reached for it, quickly reading the contents of the message he’d received and sighing in relief.

‘Pleasure doing business. Send my regards to Miss Smoak.’ It said, unsigned, like always and probably sent from an untraceable satellite phone so they wouldn’t be able to find her. He knew who it was from, there was no doubt about it. Turning back onto his side, he smiled at Felicity, who was looking at him with curiosity in her eyes, and eyebrow pulled up on her forehead.

“Everything’s gonna be okay. Amanda accepted the deal.” He said, a relieved smile tugging at his lips.

Felicity didn’t smile back, which instantly caused concern to grow deep inside of him.

“What is it?” He asked, eyebrows knitting together.

She sighed, ducking her head before meeting his gaze. “When are you going to tell Tommy?”

 

* * *

**_January 5th, 2014_ **

“Felicity? Are you in here? The door was open.” Oliver called out, shutting said open door behind him. He didn’t get an answer, only heard a shuffling sound coming from further inside the apartment.

“Felicity?!” He called out again, this time louder.

The place was a mess, luckily not in a concerning kind of way like a robbery. More like a ‘Felicity going on a cleaning spree’ or ‘Felicity trying to redecorate the apartment in a single afternoon’ kind of way. Following the trail of mess, he found her in her bedroom, music playing, swinging her hips to the melody and a stack of clothes in her arms. His clothes. Frowning, Oliver stepped further inside, looking around the room. Surrounded by boxes and things that definitely weren’t hers. They were all his.

“Felicity?” What… are you doing?” He asked, eyebrows hitched up high on his forehead.

She jumped, yelping and dropping the stack of t-shirts from her arms before spinning around on her heel, the terror of getting caught in her wide blue eyes.

“Oliver!” She yelled, clutching at her chest. “You’re here early.”

He shook his head a little. “Uhm, yeah, I finished up on the presentation for Kord Industries a little early, thought I’d surprise you.”

She laughed nervously. “Well, it worked.” She squeaked.

Oliver raised an eyebrow and let out a breathy laugh. “What’s going on?”

Felicity’s tongue darted out to wet her lips, her cheeks turning a little red. “It’s just… uhm…”

She started fidgeting with her hands, looking away nervously, almost embarrassed.

“I saw you were looking for apartments on my laptop, and maybe I jumped to conclusions but I figured you wanted to find a place for us together, so I thought, until we find something, you could just come live here for a trial run.” She blurted it all out as fast as she could, taking a deep breath when she was finished.

Oliver raised his eyebrows even higher up his forehead, mouth falling open at a loss for words. Felicity got into action, hopping over to stand in front of him, hands gesturing wildly as she tried to explain what had happened to a stunned-to-wordlessness Oliver.

“I got you some things from your house that you would need. Your mother thought it was a great idea, because you spend most of your time here anyways. And it really sucks when you have to leave me early in the morning to get clean clothes for work. I was clearing you a shelve and I had a key made for you and if this is all going too fast and not the reason why you were looking up apartments you can ignore me and if you could just give me a few minutes to swallow my pride—“

Oliver cut her off with a hard, passionate kiss. She immediately melted into him, fingers grasping at his suit jacket, afraid her knees would buckle right from underneath her. He left her breathless when they parted, her lips swollen and her eyes wide in surprise.

“I wanted to be the one to ask you, but looking at how you went to all this trouble to surprise me, I’ll let you do the honors.”

Felicity chuckled, nudging his nose with her own.

“Oliver Queen, will you move in with me?” She asked in a slightly breathless voice.

He nodded. “Yes. I would love nothing more.”

And then he was kissing her again, slowly nipping away all of Felicity’s nervous until they ended up naked in a pile of Oliver’s clothing and some other items that still had to be put away that Felicity had placed on her bed. Not that they cared, they only had eye for each other. After all, the rooms of Felicity’s little townhouse obviously had to get christened.


	12. Remorse & Research

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well well well, it's been a while, hasn't it?

**November 24 th, 2015**

Amanda’s actions had set things in motion that he couldn’t escape. He hurt people he cared about. And that was something he never intended to do. He just wanted to protect them, keep them safe. He’d made a mess. He didn’t know if Tommy would ever forgive him for this.

"Were you ever gonna tell me?" 

The words Tommy had spoken to him not even twenty four hours ago haunted him. He hadn't wanted to cause his friend pain but Felicity had insisted it was the right thing to do. To tell Tommy about the horrible things his father had done and was going to do if nobody stopped him. The truth always comes out and it was better if Tommy heard it from Oliver.

"I can’t believe you didn't come to me first. He's my father.” Tommy exclaimed, standing up so fast and with such force his desk chair was sent flying backwards, busting against a very expensive cabinet.  

Tommy paced back and forth behind his desk, running a hand through his hair, messing up the perfect coif.

“I know he's a terrible person, I don't have to see his 'apparent' criminal record to know that. He's proven time and again that he's never gonna be the father I want, the father I need. But he's still my father. You should've discussed this with me first." He spat in anger.

"I'm sorry, Tommy. I truly am but they had Meghan. The situation was a bit time sensitive and I would do whatever I have to in order to protect her."

"A week ago you didn't even know she was your daughter." Tommy bit back, eyes narrowing, venom on his tongue.

Oliver took a deep breath. "Does that really matter. She was Felicity's daughter. That was enough. I wasn’t going to put an innocent little girl in more danger than she already was when I had a way to get her to safety."

Tommy looked away, running a hand over his face. "I’m sorry, that was a low blow.” He apologized.

“Listen, I'm not mad because you gave up my father to get your daughter back. I'm mad that you didn't tell me about all of this. You've known about this undertaking thing for weeks and you never said anything."

Oliver didn’t have an excuse for that.

“Tommy, I’m sorry. ARGUS wanted me to come work for them. I’m sorry I put your family in the crosshairs so I could stay with mine.”

He'd left Tommy's office shortly after that. Tommy had made it clear that he didn't want to see Oliver. At least for a while.

He didn’t hear her come in, his attention had been elsewhere as he stared out of the window, looking out over the Queen gardens. He was almost numb, completely lost in thought, trying to calm his mind but it was no use. He was on edge, ever since he’d brought Meghan home.

“Oliver?” Felicity asked quietly, taking hesitant steps towards him.

He let his eyes shut for a second before turning around to look at her. “Hi.” He said, soft smile on his face.

Felicity smiled back at him, twinkle in her eyes. “Hi. How did it go?”

Oliver’s face fell and she sighed. “That bad, huh?”

He nodded.

"I uhm, I wanted to give this to you."  Felicity said hesitantly, looking down at the decorated shoebox in her hands.

"What is it?"  He asked.

She sighed, looking up to meet his eyes. A small smile tugged at her lips. "Letters, pictures, a diary. All dating back to the day I found out I was pregnant."  She muttered.

Oliver looked at her for a long time, the silence between them stretching on.

"I always knew you weren't gone. I just had this feeling, you know. So, I made sure that whenever you'd come home, you could catch up and read about Meghan's life." She said, nervously fidgeting with her thumb nail.

“There’s also a box downstairs I the foyer with some of your stuff from the townhouse that I thought you might like to have back.”

A lump started forming in the back of his throat. "Thank you, Felicity."  He choked out, swallowing hard.

She smiled at him, averting her eyes as her cheeks turned bright red.

The words that followed were out of his mouth before he could even think about them.

“Felicity, would you like to go to dinner with me?”

She looked up at him with shocked but hopeful eyes, lips slightly parted before she composed herself and shook her head a little. “I don't want to read too much into this, but are you asking me out on a date? Like an actual date? Like a Date-date?”  

Oliver squared his jaw and swallowed, narrowing his eyes. “Su--I mean, the implication being with dinner that you…”

A bright smile appeared on Felicity’s complexion. “Usually I'm the one talking in sentence fragments.” She teased.

Oliver took a deep breath and looked the woman he loved in the eye. “Would you like to go to dinner with me?”

She smiled again so beautifully it made his heart skip a beat before she nodded. “Yes. I would love to.”

“A second first date.” He chuckled. “How about Italian?”

 

**July 5 th, 2014**

With her feet up on the coffee table and one hand protectively wrapped around her now impossible to hide baby bump, Felicity put her pen on paper and wrote down everything she was feeling and thinking about. For Oliver to read when he came back to her. Which he would, she was sure of it.

_Dear Oliver,_

_I went to the doctor’s today, they told me we’re gonna have a daughter. I’m so excited to meet her. I wonder how much she’ll look like you. I Imagine her to have your eyes, those beautiful blues. I miss your eyes. I look at your picture almost every day but it’s not the same._

_Anyways, baby is doing fine. She’s 26cm long and steadily gaining weight. A whitish coat of a slick, fatty substance called vernix caseosa begins to cover her, protecting her skin during its long immersion in amniotic fluid. It also eases birth._

_Her body absorbs the water in the liquid and moves the rest into her large bowel. In her bowel, a sticky by-product of her digestive system, called meconium, accumulates. It'll appear in her first diaper after she's born. I’m sorry, that’s probably way too much information. I’ve been spending a lot of time on pregnancy websites._

_The doctor said to make sure I’m eating a healthy diet, that I especially need to get enough iron. The  baby needs it to make red blood cells, among other things._

_I’ve thought about names for a while now and I think I want to name her Meghan, after my grandmother. I hope you’re okay with that. I told you about her passing in this notebook a couple of times I’m sure. I miss her. She helped my mom raising me. I’m sad she’ll never get to meet our daughter, she would’ve been so happy._

_Do you remember when you met her? She thought you were so handsome and kind. I never told you this, but when we got home that day, she called me up to tell me she’d never seen me as happy as when I was with you and that we’d make beautiful children together. She predicted it, because I’m positive our daughter will be the most beautiful little girl ever._

Felicity took a deep breath as she put her pen down, sniffling at the memory of her grandmother wrapping Oliver in a hug. She’d been so excited to meet the man who made her granddaughter happy. That’s all she ever wanted for Felicity, and she was so glad to see it happen before the cancer could take her away.

She’d been diagnosed with breast cancer a month after Felicity and Oliver got together. She’d been terminal from day one. The doctors tried their best with chemo and radiation therapy, but it would only extend her life, not save it. Meghan Smoak made her peace with it, and made sure to live each day she had to the fullest.

Felicity reached for the box nestled on the couch next to her, pulling out her grandmother’s obituary and placing it in between the pages together with the letter grandma Smoak had written for her great-grandchild before she’d passed away.

_The loss of my grandmother right after I lost you was though. You disappeared so suddenly, I was kind of numb after it happened. But, knowing you’re gonna lose someone and just waiting for it to happen wasn’t any better. You both will be in my heart forever, and I will tell our daughter stories about what wonderful people you were. Still are._

_Come home soon._

_All my love, Felicity._


End file.
